Imperfect Mother's Day

My friend Lisa's daughter is in my class this year, and at the end of Teacher Appreciation Week, I got the following text from Lisa:

"I'm eating your teacher apprecation chocolate covered blueberries...mmmmmm. Sorry they didn't make it to you. Better luck next time!"

I love this text for two reasons:

1) It made me feel less guilty about the brownies I'd baked for my teacher friends (including Lisa) earlier in the week, which Bear, the girls, and I had devoured ourselves instead, and

2) While browsing mom/recipe/craft/home decor blogs makes me feel totally inadequate in just about every way, my mom-friends are real humans who don't even attempt to appear perfect...and that makes them the perfect friends, as far as I'm concerned!

The week leading up to Mother's Day was full of failed attempts at baking and homemade gifts, and while I was pretty proud of the little cookie bouquets I managed to get to my family's Mother's Day dinner last night (mostly) intact, I learned something from all the mom-blogs I trolled for ideas in the process: I will never live up to the standards set by those moms, whose homes are magazine-ready and whose baked goods always turn out like works of art. (Forget bikini models; mom-blogs are the next generation of unattainable faux perfection squishing women's self-esteem!) And although I'd like to say I don't even want to try, and to comfort myself with the idea that their kids are probably languishing in front of the TV for 17 hours a day whilst their mothers fabricate these perfect pieces and photos for their blogs, the truth is that there's at least a small part of me that really wants to be amazing at something...and who wants to cross my arms, stick out my bottom lip, and sulk every time my cookies burn or I find out I had my precious hallway chair rail installed upside down.

If I want to be all self-aware 'n' junk about it, I realized the other day that even though my job is to be patient with kids and to know that learning is a process that takes time, I'm the total opposite when it comes to myself. I don't want to invest much time, practice, or money into anything I attempt--I just want to jump right in and have it turn out awesome on the first try. And actually, now that I think about it, being the kid who never had to try too hard for A's in school may have something to do with that,and maybe Step One is to quit being a spoiled brat and develop a little work ethic...you know, now that I'm 31 and all!

Our moms, grandmas, great-grandmas, and great-GREAT grandmas got the cards, the flowers, and the gifts this weekend, and that's for good reason: Mother's Day is about appreciating our own moms and grandmothers for who they are and what they do, and we're lucky enough to have five generations' worth of moms in our family to recognize!











But this Mother's Day, I'm also appreciating my mom-friends, who do amazing things every day:

• Lisa, who, like me, is raising two little girls, but is also teaching nearly twice as many kids on twice as many days as I do, and yet never plays the "I have it much harder than you do" game (even though she totally could).





• Heidi and Elizabeth, who are each raising FOUR adorable kids and hardly have time to brush their own teeth every day (although, for the record, I'm sure they both do), but always find the time to be grateful, have fun, and help others.





• Heather and Bear's sister, Lisa, both of whom are raising preteen boys into smart, kind young men and still managing to be cool (in the discerning eyes of their sons AND in general). The two of them could teach a class on How to Be an Awesome Mom Without Losing Your Own Identity.





• My colleague, Cindy, who launched Honor the Mom as a full-on movement this year (click the link to read about her "random act of kindness" idea for single and military moms)





• My sister, Jen, who's four months into motherhood and has already mastered the fine art of "I'm doing what I think is best for my kid, but thanks for your opinion."





• Amber, Melanie, Emily, Jesse, Trish, Amanda, Kim, and so many others who are always willing to share their experiences, worries, mistakes, or ideas to help me figure out what the heck I'm doing!

None of these moms are perfect, and none of them pretend to be: they're honest, real humans who sometimes lose their patience, have toys on their floor, serve drive-thru for dinner, or eat the teacher appreciation treats. And I'm proud to count myself among them.

Most of all, I'm proud to be the mommy of these two little girls!

Happy Mother's Day!