Kid Quotes

Having kids is excellent entertainment. Here are some of my favorite recent (or semi-recent) quotes from the girls:

Ellie: "Daddy has a HUUUUGE butt."

Me: "Ellie! That's not nice! And no, he doesn't!"

Ellie, correcting herself: "He has a LARGE butt."
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Keira, doing her homework: "Spelling HE is about as easy as dropping a screwdriver."
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Ellie, in the car and totally at random: "I think Benny the Bull [from "Dora"] has three barns...one for him, one for his pets, and one for dance parties."
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Keira: "We got a new kid at school today. He and I gave each other a few little hugs. But then he threw up and had to go home."
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Keira: "What are the lights on the back of the car called?"

Me: "Tail lights."

Keira: "So it's like the car has a head and a tail? I think I'd rather call them butt lights."
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Me, snuggling with Keira: "Does your mama love you?"

Keira: "Yes." [pause, then a coy smile] "And if you don't, you should."
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Keira, watching a commercial for "Forever Lazy" adult footie pajamas: "Mom, you should get one of those, because you're ALWAYS lazy."
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Ellie, when Keira asked to play with her new doll: "No! She's ALLERGIC to you!"
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Keira, playing a game with Ellie: "I won! [perky Barbie voice] Now I get to disgrace you."
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Ellie, calmly, while getting her hair brushed: "Mommy, I'm feeling fierce today."