Parenting F"ale"

I could tell you many things about Bear: the fact that he loves football enough to watch reruns of old games; how he can eat five M&M's and then leave the rest of the package for another day (as if they'd last that long with me around!); that he detests getting up early in the morning; how once he hears that something electronic around the house isn't working right, he's compelled to figure it out and fix it immediately.

I would think the girls would have plenty to add to that list: how his beard is scratchy when he pretends to gobble their necks, that he's always willing to play "Super Soccer Kick" with them in the hallway, or that he has a "secret shortcut" whenever he drives them somewhere. But here's the #1 fact that seems to come to their minds--especially Ellie's mind--when it comes to Daddy:

"He likes beer."

That's it...his defining characteristic. This is strange and kind of hilarious to me, because Bear drinks mayyyyybe one beer a night, tops, and that is the extent of his connection to beer. It's an odd thing for them to find so memorable, right?

So we'll be at the grocery store and walk past the magazines, and Ellie will say, "I know Daddy would like a BEER magazine!"

Or I'll ask Keira what we should get Daddy for Christmas and she'll say, "Hmmm...well, we know he likes beer!" (And then she will beg to use her own money to buy him a bottle of beer, and I have to try to explain why that would be all kinds of inappropriate).

Or Ellie will announce that she's building a hideout for everyone she knows, and that "it'll have BEER in it...for boys." (And then I will start naming women we know who also drink beer, as if it's essential that my 3-year-old be conscious of gender stereotypes surrounding types of alcoholic beverages. Because that's what matters.)

What ACTUALLY matters is that one day, one of the girls is going to make enough Daddy/beer related comments to convince someone (possibly one of their teachers, also known as my colleagues!) that Bear is some kind of alcoholic...or, at least, a beer-guzzling couch potato. And he's totally not. He's this totally sweet guy who loves to hang out with his family and occasionally be silly. See?



Okay, bad choice of pictures. How about this one?


Yeah, that's better.