Game Over?

A couple of weeks ago, on our weekly pilgrimage into Chick Fil-A's family night, we walked past a car with a license plate frame that read:

Girls: 2 Boys: 0

Game Over

I nudged Bear and asked, "Do we need one of those?"

Anyone whose left ring finger is occupied will tell you that the second you get married, people start asking when you're going to have a baby; and before the stitches are in place following that first baby, the "When are you gonna have another one?" questions start flying. (I'm sure this pattern ends somewhere around the third or fourth kid, when people instead start asking each other behind your back whether you are completely insane and/or plan to take up residence inside a giant shoe.)

If you have a girl, people want to know whether you plan to try for a boy, and vice versa--it's important for everyone to prepare their "Better start saving up for those weddings!" or "You're only a couple short of a basketball team!" jokes if you decide to fold 'em without having at least one of each.

Both coming from families of three kids, Bear and I had always tentatively planned on having a trifecta of our own, although Bear wouldn't have argued with me if I'd only wanted two. Now that Elliana is here and we've gotten another good taste of the sleep deprivation, the separation anxiety, and the boob addiction (hers!), plus the added challenge of trying to balance our time and attention between two cubs, though, Bear has pretty much decided that the cub factory has closed up shop permanently.

If it were entirely up to me, I still wouldn't be so sure at this point. On one hand, we both love having two girls, and neither of us has any particular desire to have a son (sorry, Family Name, but maybe one of the girls will grow up to be a feminist--or a lesbian!--and keep you after all). The idea of affording another maternity leave and several more years of me working part-time, not to mention arranging even occasional babysitting for three kids, definitely tips the scales in favor of us being "two and through."

Plus, there are lots of things to look forward to once we're parents of Big Kids and done with the baby stage: Disneyland trips, vacations, baseball games, holidays, and...well...pretty much everything is a lot easier when you don't have to tote around a diaper bag, dress for discreet nursing, or plan around naptimes. Many of my distant fantasies (sleeping in, going out for the night with Bear, enjoying a spa day or a Happy Hour without the involvement of a breast pump) will all come true much sooner if we stop here.

Then again, I'm one of those freaks who loved being pregnant, and the thought that my uterus will be unoccupied forevermore majorly bums me out sometimes. Watching Keira turn two and leave all things babyish behind was hard, but I was already pregnant with Elliana and knew we'd get to experience all of those milestones again. Life without a baby is definitely easier, but is it better? Our snuggly, shrieking, giggling, open-mouthed kissing second-born leads me to say, not necessarily!

If we are, in fact, done, come April 2011 I'll be the sobbing mess in the corner--please forward my mail accordingly. Maybe, though, when that time rolls around, Bear will feel a little nostalgic for the feeling of drool in his beard and consider a Cubby Three after all. Only time will tell!